Thursday, September 15, 2016

Posted 2nd June 2015 by Limner

Redux:  "Eggs press Mail from a Free Range Chicken"

Water, water, everywhere, and nary a drop you'd want to drink! The post office boasts about how neither rain nor snow etc,. will stop them from delivering mail. Well, ha! They weren't in Texas when they wrote that. Recently, people were takin' on water, gettin' ready to float. It rained for twenty-two consecutive days in Austin. Bless their hearts. A coffin encased in a concrete vault escaped its six foot confines. Had I been her spouse, I'd still be running, seeing as how hers was the only coffin that made it to the road. And then the waters receded, leaving her stranded. Poor thing. I tell you, it was some kind of wet in the land of blue bonnets. Hope my fellow Texans are safe and dry now. 

The Honda is a work horse that knows how to tread water. It can find its way to the post office on its own if it had to, but I helped. And, lo! there was mail. A postcard. A little worse for the rain, it was a happy sight for sore eyes. We hadn't heard from our little free ranger in some time. People would call or text, saying they could have sworn they saw her, or a chick that looked an awful lot like her in some out of the way place in the state. I refused to worry. As long as she wasn't on tv with that creepy Colonel Sanders singing about "chicken in da beans" I knew she's be okay. She knows where home is. But, oh, how happy I am! The chick's all right. Do you reckon she's hitchin' now? Surely she wouldn't steal a bike, seeing as how her feet can't reach the pedals.

Oh, I see! Some kind soul let her ride in a comfy basket lined with straw. Yep, a clear sign that she's still in Texas. I wonder who took the picture. It's a view from an entirely different perspective. But it's her.  

Time to grab a map and find the post office in Chickenchit, TX., since she's headed that way. I hope a card from me will get there ahead of her. "Hmm. "Let me see," said the blind man. All I can do is try. Will tell her y'all said hey.


  1. You sound like you are feeling better and may I say I am so glad .Oh wow they found a big 800 pound gator here and big are still swimming in that lake ...okay well not much to say about the sense of some folks . I love the postcard and love the chickenchit tx . Ahe yes miss my chicken in da beans they no longer have that item . How do you feel about the crispy sunburnt colonel ? LOL .

  2. Poor gators. Our dinosaurs? I wonder how large they maxi out at. Someone found such a large fella in his garage. No one explained how one managed to back up into a space the size of a lawn mower, in a garage with the door closed. The homeowner saw the 800 pound gator just minutes after he opened the door. The homeowner, not the gator. LOL.

    Those commercials are insulting to chickens. ;)